"...and cool your wings"

I am not sure I fully understand the logistics of air travel. I know roughly the physics. Keep moving forward; if you don't you hit the ground.

Arrived in plenty of time for the flight and did the automated check in so that my, by now, two bags (I had to buy another one for all the CDs I bought as well as prizes for you to win at the end of the coming week), were duly disappeared out the back of the check-in desk. The formalities were over and done within about 5 minutes which was pretty good going.

When the flight was called we duly boarded and I sat down. We then waited for nearly 2 hours as people from connecting flights arrived and also people got up and left. New people arrived and sat down. Luggage then had to be removed from the hold and new luggage loaded as they had overbooked the flight.

Bladders were filling so people kept going to the khazi and were shooed back to their seats by the attendants. "We can't push back until everyone is seated". Another 20 mins would go by...."right is everybody..." another few people would rush to the loo. When we eventually stared taxiing I peered out of the window and counted about a dozen planes in a queue ahead of us. This was taking forever.

Still taxiing, a woman got out of her seat to...."SIT DOWN!" The flight attendants were getting a little fractious by this time and frankly, I don't blame them. "TURN IT OFF" - to a stroppy teen still playing with his computer game. "SEAT UPRIGHT AND TABLE STOWED" to another youth from the same family who was trying to sleep with his head on the table. As a family they needed to be on "Con Air" I think.

At last we took off; a month later and from a different airport but "Wild Hogs" was still one of the in-flight movies. Despite all the delays we arrived a mere 20 mins late and that due to being in a holding pattern over Heathrow.

Caught the train back home and fell asleep in the bath.